Holidays are where even the smoothest co-parenting arrangements tend to get tested. A regular schedule can run for months without a hitch, and then Thanksgiving or Christmas arrives and both parents feel like this year matters more than the standard rotation.
How the Standard Possession Order Handles Holidays
Texas’s Standard Possession Order sets specific, alternating holiday schedules that override the regular possession schedule — meaning the parent who would otherwise have the child on a given weekend may not actually have them if it falls during a holiday period assigned to the other parent that year. Thanksgiving typically alternates by odd and even years, and the Christmas holiday is usually split into two blocks, also alternating each year. If you have not looked closely at your own order’s holiday provisions, it’s worth doing before the season starts rather than during it.
Read the Order the Way It’s Actually Written
Most conflicts we see are not about parents disagreeing on what’s fair — they’re about parents remembering the schedule differently than what the order actually says. Pull the written order out and confirm the exact pickup and drop-off times, not just which parent “has Christmas” in general terms. Orders are often specific down to the hour.
Read your Child’s School Calendar
Most orders are based on the child’s school holiday, which changes year to year. Thanksgiving can be a full week holiday, just Thursday-Friday, or something else. Holidays are not based on the parents’ work holidays.
Plan Logistics Early
Travel, extended family visits, and school breaks all complicate holiday exchanges. Communicating early — ideally weeks in advance — about specific pickup times, locations, and any travel plans gives both parents time to adjust and reduces the odds of a last-minute dispute. If travel outside the area is planned, check whether your order requires advance notice or the other parent’s consent.
When Parents Want to Deviate From the Order
Many co-parents agree to trade holidays or adjust the schedule for a specific event — a family reunion, a milestone birthday, a once-in-a-while opportunity. That’s fine, but put any agreed change in writing (a text or email confirming the specifics works) so there’s no confusion afterward, and understand that an informal agreement for one year doesn’t change the underlying order going forward.
If a Dispute Can’t Be Resolved
If the other parent is not following the holiday schedule as written, document what happened and when, and avoid taking matters into your own hands by withholding the child in response. Consistent violations of a possession order can be addressed through the court, but self-help generally backfires and can be used against the parent who does it.
If your holiday schedule is unclear, outdated, or not being followed, our Child Custody team can help you sort it out well before the holidays arrive. Contact us to review your order. Consultations are free. Call (972) 772-8005.
